How do I keep going forward while carrying bags of really bad errors of my past? Isolation?

I posted something similar a month ago, but I rewrote it in a way that it should be more productive.

I'm not a good person. I've made multiple decisions in the past that I am not proud of.

For context of what they are, you can see my previous posts​ on my profile.

Another one was where I asked out a 17 y/o as a 19 y/o roughly 10 years ago, when I was a month into college amd she was still in high school. Back then I was careless and I felt like I was "just" asking out someone that I met in the same school amd after-school club 2 or so years prior. But now having more understanding of things like power imbalances and life stages, especially in teenagers, I feel a little bit like Epstein.

I have also become angry and have been mean in general to others before, throwing insults at former friends over games and lashing out at parents 3-4 years ago for example.

I want advice from strangers and 3rd parties, because I think I have a problem with dwelling on the past, I don't want to become a venting mess in front of my friends anymore like I used to years ago, and I am (selfishly and cowardly) afraid of what they'll think if they knew these things about me.

I don't know if the people I know deserve to know about the errors of my ways and who I really am, and I don't know how I should deal with these things on my own without bothering so many people and making thjngs awkward. It would be great to hear your advice.