ASTARION WOULD HAVE A LACTATION KINK AND I CAN EMPIRICALLY PROVE IT

ONE: what is the opposite of death/dying/undeath? That's right. Virility. What could be hotter for a corpse than the unobtainable spark of life? The forbidden fruit is entrancing, exotic, arousing.

TWO: breast milk is made from blood. It's something he would theoretically be able to drink, enjoy, and digest. A sweet little break from copper? yes, please! which leads us to

THREE: It's pseudo(?) canon that he has a sweet tooth (it's his unique avatar response for Halsin's "tell me something about yourself" convo) and breast milk? you bet your sweet ass it's sweet.

FOUR: titties. (though I do imagine he's an ass man, personally. titties are always a bonus)

FIVE: he would be stealing something from a baby and I just think he would really enjoy that fact

supposedly chocolate breast milk straight up tastes like yoohoo according to the father of none pizza left beef and co-creator of young sheldon so do with that information what you will.