Struggling and looking for advice

Hi everyone. Looking for some general words of wisdom or support or shared experiences.

I am autistic - late diagnosed at age 37. Have a fairly good insight into how I function.

My teenage daughter was diagnosed as autistic at age 14 (last year) after a drawn out period of being permanently at home after a head injury.

During all of this I realised that she has been struggling with masking and not fitting in and being overwhelmed for a LONG time and is totally burnt out.

She hasn’t been back to school in over a year and I’m confident it is simply the wrong environment for her.

She spends her days at home building Lego and watching moves and TV series. All of these things need to hold a certain level of interest for her to invest in.

We have tried specific ASD and teenage therapies and she has removed herself from those and has put up a barrier to any further help or treatment. So it basically falls on me to try and support her, which I desperately want to do.

We go out once a week climbing/bouldering, but I have to ensure I don’t do anything that turns it into a perceived demand. This has spread into most of her life where expression of shared interest in anything she is enjoying causes an immediate panic response and she won’t go back to that thing. It’s like PDA on steroids.

Until now she has had a special interest of one move franchise and has built her days around it as well as filling her bedroom, which is her safe space, with all the stuff that the franchise represents. It seems that the interest is no longer special, and she is experiencing what I can only suggest is grief to the loss.

So at the moment she feels she has no structure to her days/weeks, I can’t suggest anything (she understands this) and yet she still needs my help.

What on earth can I do to help her?

She won’t interact with anyone except me, is refusing any form of professional help and I now can’t suggest anything to help for risk of a PDA response.

Totally stuck and so worried about my girl.