I feel like giving up on this. Adenosyl?

Hello! I've never used Reddit since I was like 15. I just wanna share my story and maybe get some advice? I have had brain fog, extreme tiredness, nausea, dissociation, headaches. I never really got it checked until it got to the point where I had to, and I was told that I had low B12. It was apparently not "critically low" but enough that I was told to get supplements (it was 170). I started taking over the counter cyanocobalamin. It was a period that began some of the worst three months of my life, I was on the supplement for a few weeks, not only was their no improvement but I was so extremely depressed, my dissociation got worse. I felt like I was going crazy because I could find nothing about this online, but I eventually found several posts in various forums including here sharing similar stories. I have the MTHFR variant, and so I changed my type, and went with methylcobalamin. This was after several weeks with no supplementation at all to try to reset myself. I took it twice, both times I had severe panic attacks, the worst I've ever had, which is also apparently something that can happen for the methylated type. Now what.

I want my initial symptoms to improve, because it's not fun living with this, but the effects of the B12 so far have just not been worth any potential help that it could give, and I don't know what to do. I have heard that hydroxocobalamin and adenosylcobalamin are "gentler" for "sensitive people", so I want to maybe give one of them a go and start at an extremely low dose. I don't want shots and besides I can't find anything for hydroxocobalamin near me so I'm going to try the adenosylcobalamin I think. I haven't read any horror stories about it at least, but I need your thoughts, since I have had such terrible experiences is it even worth trying adenosylcobalamin? Am I going crazy?