How do we go on

I think I've made several posts here already, It's just very difficult and I don't think I'll be comfortable talking with a therapist or grief counselor.

I've been breaking down again and it just all seems impossible to feel okay after losing mom, I know that she's in a better place, that she's not in pain anymore but I miss her so much.

Everywhere I go I remember the memories we made the silly things we talked about and it all just seems like it was yesterday. It feels like days get harder as time goes by. I initially felt relief, peace and joy for her.

Now it's all just never ending emptiness, sadness, it feels like my heart has been torn apart. I know I sound like I'm just whining, but it genuinely hurts so much, how do we even go on.

I'm coming back to work in a few days and the thought of coming home to an empty room without her is just, it's terrible.

I truly hope we all heal from this.