dental phobia and hygene

this is embarrassing but i 36 f am very phobic of dentists. I’m like a young child when it comes to the dentists. I had pretty good teeth until I had my first child. i feel like at the dentist i panic and shake last time it’s embarrasijg but i went in to get a filling and had a panic attack and had to walk out. i will need to go back and bring someone close to me. I feel like my pho has increased after a filling last year that hurt.

I need to address the anxiety, I know, but what I also wanted to know do you think most dental issues are genetic or because of poor care of teeth? Do you think that most people with immaculate dental hygiene, have very few problems? The most people you see with bad teeth have bad hygiene or do you think it’s that they got bad genes?

The reason I asked is I was wondering if some dentist can come down there and also on the kind of oral hygiene They see with people who are very good teerh. What is the oral hygiene routine of people who repeatedly have no cavities and no oral problems? Of course brushing flossing but like how many times a day do you see people do these things you have consistently no issues? Because I hate the dentist so much I’m trying to improve my oral hygiene so that hopefully I never have an issue again although it might be genetic also due to having children. I recently had my second child (the laughable thing is I had unmedicated birth, and I can’t even get filling lol it’s very different😂) can I see it now I’m having even more problems with my teeth and I’m having so much anxiety about getting it fixed or even going in for a checkup. sessitivity in different areas, recession i’m a mess

my current routine I was doing is one extensive brushing at night and extensive flossing . I’m increasing to brushing twice with mouthwash. I did give up flouride when I was trying to conceive my first child and that could’ve been part of one of my teeth got worse not just the hormones, but I worry about it because I heard it’s in neurotoxin.