I know I will just have advices like “better move on” but I still want to have some ideas about why this guy ghosted me all of sudden. I’m so hurt still.. so even if you think I’m stupid I hope you don’t get too harsh on my story :( 

This is a bit long story and can be grammatically wrong (I’m not an english speaker). Hope you can understand it.

So I and he had talked to each other starting Dec last. We have talked about relationship values and so much stuffs. We were literally emotionally connected to each other and approaching to the idea of relationship very seriously. Every time we were doing videochat, he did look obsessed with me like he just looked at me so romantically as if hes hypnotized. Honestly, I found it a little bit weird because he didn’t really keep convo much but his reaction looking at me was too overreacted but still he claimed he does it because looking at me makes him feel so happy and he finds me so attractive. It was sorta romantic while I thought it could be kind of lovebombing. But still I talked about it to him and our videochat time got more natural. Around April, he wanted me to be his gf and I said yes. And I flew to go see him (from Asia to America). It was my first time to go meet a guy. It was more special this time because Ive had such great bond with him and he was my crush. However, very unexpected thing happened, he dumped me within 3 days of my arrival to America. He said he doesn’t feel I’m the right girl for him but loves to spend time with me. It was very shocking to me at the time. He had been so lovey do vey online always telling me how he loves me how he finds me so gorgeous but the person was gone in reality. It was really.. heartbreaking for him because we’ve been such lovely couple online for 6 months but he figured we were not meant to be a couple within 3 days of meeting in person. It was really sad every day while I had to stay in the same bed with him. He still enjoyed spending time with me and treated me like his gf. I told him stop treating me like his gf. But he said he still loves spending time with me and treating me nicely not just for sex. He said he found me so attractive sexually and also personality wise. It was just that I’m not his gf material. He also said I could go on a date with other American guys If I want to as its my decision. I accepted the truth at the point and had to get a new returning ticket to go back to my country faster. As soon as I got to the airport he started texting me very slowly. I couldn’t really believe the reality. He still treated me like his gf pretty much and our chemistry seemed getting much better day by day even though he said we were not a match. But so strangely, he slowly started to take distance from me as soon as we got apart. I could understand why he does that but also same time I wanted to convince him because I could see him liking me more day by day. and my convincing did work. Surisingly he came back to me telling me he was actually scared to have me in reality from online. It was overwhleming for him. So, he decided to shut down his emotion. It didn’t really make sense to me but I decided to accept it as he just came back to me. He still hurt me with some of his words like its his penis who likes me not his mental emotion towards me. He just found me super attractive by my appearance. It was really sad to hear it because I did genuinely love him. And we said if it was only sexual attraction, then he wouldn’t be talking to me so much every day. He could still meet women in his town.  

And since then We’d been pretty good until this happened. He disappeared for 15 hours for 2 days in row. He informed me he’d get busy hanging out with his friends but I did not expect he would not text me for each 15 hours. I asked him if he can text me at least one time while hes hanging out for the day. He immediately said he can’t do that and again dumped me. He said its something he can’t compromise on. When he just dumped me again that easily I got so hurt again. Hes been lovey do vey but again dumped me so easily while I haven’t given a great pressure to him. Then, I tried to convince him again over and over……. and it did work and he came back again. He said I’m the only woman who makes him come back. he said he’s always dreaming of me. He must actually like me. Then, he bought a ticket to my country to see me for 2 weeks. He said he loves spending time with me and wants to see me again. He wanted to see our chemistry again if we can be a couple. But still he did call me his girl and talked about our future as if we were already a couple while he couldn’t really label us. 

I was so exhausted of him coming back to me and dumping me again. I was scared by the possibility of being dumped again in my country. So, told him I can’t really fully be devoted to him this time. I told him I will go on dates until we meet again (in 2months). He said its not something he likes but respected my opinion as he was the one who couldn’t label us.

And then I did sleep with a guy and told him. He got upset but still couldn’t be too upset as he knew he is also part to blame. I did tell him I still love him so much even if I slept with other guy. Literally I was… I know people would just think I’m a crazy girl but all I could think of was him even if I hooked up with other guy. He still loved me. He said it’s a bit irritating but hes still happy as im still coming back to him. and since then we’d been video chatting every day for 3 hours before he goes to work in the morning. You can imagine how it is not easy to have a call with someone for 3 hours before you go to work everyday. But since we started talking last year, hes been doing that and also he’s been sending money (he really enjoyed treating me) to me. This seemed very much like a devotion.

The night before he finally ghosted me were one of the romantic days. We had 3 hours romantic video chat call. It was same as usual and very lovely to each other but next day he suddenly ditched me and blocked me from every platform. It was the day he finally passed last test of his new job position. (he’s had multiple tests before for months and we were about to celebrate it as he finally paseed the last one). And still all of his friends also blocked me……………I couldn’t believe it was happening. There was no reason for him to block me. Weve had some issues but recently its been really romantic and we were getting better planning his trip to my country together. He also booked hotel for us already. I still don’t know the reason why he ghosted me all of sudden while hes supposed to come to my country. Hes been even asking me to stay with him everyday of his stay in my country as he does love to spend time with me. But the guy is gone. Disappeared without telling me anything leaving question mark to me. its been a week and I’m still hurt. I know I need to move on. I know it more than anyone else. But I still needed better closure. I tried to guess what the reason to block me. But I don’t really know…… I would probably never find it out. What would have been the reason that he blocks me all of sudden and shut down everything when he was so romantic to me just the day before? I checked his flight. He still has it and the hotel we were supposed to stay together too. I used to tell him he can meet other girls then as he cant make me his gf. But he’s been always so firm that he does not wanna go on a date or talk to other girls as hes attracted to me so much. Maybe it couldve been a lie. I would never know. Also, he’s been sending me like total 3000 usd as part of his affection. It was one of the ways he showed his affection as we were LDR couple or intimate (he is not even rich). So, I’m not sure how this guy moved on and blocked me so easily while hes put some effort to me. He does aboslutely have some avoidant side. 

I know its pointless to ask but what would possibly make him to ghost me all of sudden? 

Could you guess why this guy ghosted me all of sudden?