First Year Complete

I did it. 1 full year.

This Sunday last year was one of reckoning. That deep shame, guilt, fear, and wanting to hide from it all. I had given myself permission to have a “screw it- I’ll drink if I want” August and boy did I. I blacked out every night for 3 weeks straight. Ended up with a huge mystery injury and no idea how I was getting home.

After a drag brunch on my last drinking day, with a bad case of the shakes, my best friend took me aside and said “we are worried about you”. I knew I needed to stop. It took the people I love (and who love me) holding up a mirror to my behavior and me knowing, I couldn’t outrun it anymore.

I lurked on this sub for years before I worked up the courage to get sober. I didn’t think I could. I remember seeing people post about their milestones and being in awe but also saying how? Now I join you badasses- 365 days in.

I highly recommend therapy and if needed, medication. Lexapro and Naltrexone saved me. Prior to these things, my only coping mechanism was drinking. And overtime that turned into physical dependence. At the end I didn’t recognize myself. All I cared about was drinking, numbing.

Sobriety is the best gift I’ve ever given myself. Like others will tell you, it’s hard. But overall, it’s incredible. The safety I have been able to give myself. The trust I’ve built. The peace I have. The promise I’ve kept. The strength I’ve shown.

I’ve found me again.