Need tactical tips to handle the shock of being looked at

My therapist said my biggest block isn't dysphoria or passing—it's the sheer terror of being perceived on the street.

I lived as a trans woman for 1 year. Then life collapsed: discrimination at university, hostility in a sports group, zero money, no family support, no structural stability. So I detransitioned briefly—purely to survive. Now I'm coming back. I have an appointment to remove my beard because I can't stand it anymore.

The irony? I have high passability. Most people read me as a woman. But I freeze under glances. It's not even about being "clocked"—it's the energetic confrontation of eyes on me. Every look feels like waiting for a punch.

And I live in a conservative area. Staring is the norm. My nervous system treats every gaze as a threat.

I know who I am. But how do you handle the exhaustion of simply being seen after trauma? How do you stop shrinking when your brain screams "danger" over a stranger's look?

Any practical tips or solidarity would mean everything. I'm tired of hiding—but I'm equally tired of being afraid.

*I had to use IA to help write this