Not feeling any pleasure during anal

I’m 19 and have slept with 6 men (bottomed for all) with all sizes of dicks (below average to way above average) but I’ve never really felt any pleasure at all during sex. I’ve never even really felt it when using a dildo on myself. I don’t know if I’m doing something wrong or how to make it feel good but it’s really irritating considering the amount of effort that goes into bottoming with shaving/ douching. I also normally tear my hole when I’m bottoming which I think maybe could kill some nerves or something but I don’t know. I’m very frustrated about the situation and it’s really demotivating me to have sex because I don’t know what’s in it for me