If I can't send it, I'll do it here.

I have to admit, I wasn't expecting a reply at all, let alone so soon. I apologize for how long it has taken me to reply, I needed to make sure I said the right things and was in the right mental space.

I don't want to reopen the trauma of the past, but there are things I cannot reconcile with our history, namely how badly I acted as a partner. I recognize we were young and in very stressful situations, but I feel that was still no excuse for how I treated you. Knowing you are still effected by it, I want to do anything I can to assist with your healing.

I also wanted to thank you; if you had not taken the steps needed to heal, I never would have come to terms with what happened and I wouldn't have met my wonderful partner or had any of my 3 beautiful children.

I would enjoy getting to hear how your life has unfolded after our time together and I would be happy to tell you mine, it looks like we are both happy where we are!

My therapist recommended that I continue reaching out. I dont want to unless I know that is OK with you. I want you to know you are 100% in control of any further contact and if you wish, this will be the last message I send.

Before I message anything else I would like to know if you are OK with continuing our conversation. I will respect whatever response you provide and will uphold any boundaries you put in place.