Does anyone resent their brother/s? TW: mentions of SA

How do I even begin? Like many people in India, I grew up in a patriarchal household. I'm 27F and I graduated from my master's programme last year. I already have a lot of shame from not graduating at the same time as my peers. I've been struggling with depression for years now and I finally got diagnosed with major depressive disorder two years ago behind my family's back. I don't want to blame my depression for my lack of initiative but I haven't been able to pull myself up and find a job or a way forward. I've decided that perhaps I should try for scholarships abroad. I approached the topic with my father, asking to apply for a passport and he told me to maybe apply in October because September is my brother's birthday month and he wants a new camera so money will be a bit tight.

I don't blame my brother, he's my half brother and he's 12 years old. But I can't help but be resentful of him and my other half brother.

There's a huge difference in the way my two half brothers were raised in comparison to me and my sister. They both were given ipads since they were toddlers when I wasn't even allowed a phone till I'd completed class 10, which was an Android phone that broke down often, and I was always blamed for it happening. My sister and I were made to do chores as young as 7 years old and my brothers are now 12 and 16 and they don't even wash their own plates or know how to iron their clothes. One time my phone screen kept glitching and I told my father and he said "what can we do?". The same day my brother's new iPad arrived in the mail and I got so upset I just went to my room, and I could hear my father tell my brother "your sister is jealous". These are just small instances I can think of now. But it's been a lifetime of this happening. I love my half brothers; I was almost a teenager when the older one was born and I feel like I basically raised them. They are sweet and kind, albeit a bit blind to the preferential treatment but can I really blame them? They are so young themselves. Does anyone know how to deal with such conflicting feelings of love and resentment?

(Extra context because I would still like to get more off my chest but you can skip if you like)

I've had a tumultuous life to say the least, I've been SA'd twice in my childhood, grew up with parents in active alcohol addiction, child of divorce, death of a sibling, loss of a parental figure, you name it. At some point it feels like I'm just being sorry for myself. I have this voice that tells me "people go through so much trauma and they survive and thrive, get over it" in my head, and I'd never tell anyone that but I can't help but think it to myself. I know I need to get a job, any job but all I do is sleep and let my family tell me I'm being lazy.

Either way, I still do think I have some fighting spirit left in me and I'm tired of going down without a fight. Does anyone know any ways to earn some money quick, just to pay the passport fees by September in before applications begin. I know application fees will be a hassle but that will be a problem for another day. My school best friend is also getting married in October and I would like to earn some money to buy wedding clothes, I'm from the northeast and I've never been to a desi wedding so I don't own any Indian traditional wear! They are so beautiful but they seem so pricey and extravagant! I'd really appreciate some leads if possible!