Me (27F) and the guy (28M) I've been seeing kept things undefined because my life was up in the air. 8ish months later, neither of us has gone anywhere. What now?

I went on a few dates with a guy earlier this year somewhat on a whim, and we both initially intended for things to be casual since my circumstances were pretty up in the air. Neither of us expected it to turn into anything serious, but we both kept making an effort to see each other and now it's somehow been 8ish months of consistency.

We live a few hours apart and usually see each other about once a month, but we text every day and have since pretty much the beginning. He's met some of my family and friends, I've met his friends, and his family knows about me. When we're together in person it feels very relationship-y, and even when we're apart we both keep each other up-to-date on our day-to-day lives. We ask about what's going on with each other, remember/follow up on things, make future plans to see each other, etc. We've also supported each other through some genuinely difficult life events this year.

Maybe a month or two into this, we actually did have a conversation about what was happening between us. We both said we liked it, but didn't really know what "it" was. At the time, we also talked about not wanting to hold the other person back from finding someone who might be closer/more stable and not wanting either of us to make major life decisions around something that was still so new.

That was particularly relevant because I've been in a pretty major transitional period of my life with the potential for a career change. There are still some big uncertainties about what my life will look like in the near future, and I don't know where I'll end up geographically. At the time, it made sense to me not to ask someone I'd recently met to factor me into his life when I couldn't even tell him what my own future looked like. That conversation was probably 6 months ago though and neither of us went anywhere.

We still talk every day, make the effort to visit each other, we know a ridiculous amount about each other's daily lives, passions, anxieties, families, friends, hobbies, etc at this point. I'm not seeing anyone else, and as far as I know he isn't either, although we've never actually agreed to be exclusive.

He's also been incredibly consistent with me from the beginning. He's not super gushy or someone who constantly verbalizes his feelings, but he's very compassionate through his actions. He asks questions, remembers things I've told him, follows up, notices when something is off, and has been supportive through some really difficult things over the last few months. He also always follows through when he makes a commitment to someone or says he's going to do something, which is new for me. I'm very used to empty promises from previous relationships, so it's been a strange transition for me as a words of affirmation person to learn to put more weight on his actions when he uses his words more sparingly.

I think part of why I've let the ambiguity continue is that I feel guilty asking him for commitment when my own future is still uncertain. I don't want him to feel like he has to make major decisions around me when I can't tell him where I'll be a year from now. At this point though, I'm quite attached to him and I'd like to seriously give this a go if he's open to it. At first the ambiguity was okay because he's so consistent and his actions reassured me enough, but I've realized that I'm starting to have big feelings for him that I want to be able to tell him about. I'm getting to a point where I want to know how he thinks about us and whether we're both building towards the same thing rather than continuing to try to infer it from his behavior.

I'm nervous about bringing it up because my life is still uncertain and I genuinely don't know if i'm allowed to ask someone for a serious relationship when I can't promise what the logistics of that relationship will look like a year from now. I'm worried that asking for commitment under these circumstances is selfish and I don't want to hurt him.

Has anyone been through something like this, where something casual gradually turned into this sort of situation? Is it fair for me to ask for something serious when my life's still a mess and how would I even revisit that conversation?