I hate being a bottom

Today i had what u can call sex with someone. He was a virgin. I had no much experience too with my backyard. First i had to do my whole body with hair removal cream which is such a hassle and then i had to clean down there which is another terrible job to do then when i was finally ready to have sex it was painful i didn’t enjoy it a bit. I loved the cuddles and kisses but damn the butt stuff hurts i cried from the pain despite the fact we did use lube (cooking oil) and we had good amount of foreplay and i tried to relax but it is really hard when it feels like being stabbed in the butt. I hate it. This means ill never be able to have sex…just venting i guess