Attention please 🚨

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I am 21M and I went to transgender sex workers/prostitutes four times, and I deeply regret it. I recently got tested and my reports came back HIV positive and HSV-1 & HSV-2 positive.

It has been 14 days since I received my reports, and honestly, my life has felt like hell since that day.

I’m still not financially independent and I’m dependent on my family. I haven’t been able to tell my family about my condition. Only one doctor nearby, whom I know, is aware of my situation I couldn't tell this to anyone i al suffering this my self, i have decided not to share this with anyone i know, my friends got a dought by be behaviou( depressed) and keep on asking me but I am managing with some random stories I am not even sharing my food with anyone nor sitting beside them . I also don’t have enough money for my treatment and medicines, which makes everything even more stressful.

Mentally, I’m suffering a lot. I feel depressed, extremely stressed, and constantly worried about what my future is going to look like. I can’t even look my family in the face or talk to them normally anymore. I’ve lost my appetite and sometimes I can barely eat.

Before all of this, I used to study around 8 hours a day. Now I struggle to study for even 30 minutes. I can’t concentrate on anything because my mind is constantly thinking about my health and my future.

At one point, I was thinking about suicide. Thankfully, I somehow motivated myself and managed to get out of that state. I’ve decided that I want to keep living, earn money, and make my parents happy. I’ve also decided that I don’t want to get married and that I won’t have sex again. I just want to live for my parents and make sure they are happy.

One thing I’m still confused about is how I got HIV and HSV despite using protection.

I used condoms and insisted on not kissing or doing other things that I considered risky. But somehow, I still ended up testing positive. I’m still trying to understand how this happened.

I’m sharing this because before all of this happened, I used to think that experiencing sex was “cool” and that nothing would happen as long as you used condoms. I was wrong to think that way.

Please don’t make the same mistakes I made. Be careful about your sexual health, understand that condoms reduce risk but don’t eliminate every possible risk, and get tested when you’ve had a potential exposure.

I also remember that before all of this, I had chatted with someone from this subreddit. He specifically warned me not to go to a prostitute because he said he was also a victim and was suffering from an STD. I didn’t listen to him.

I genuinely wish I had listened to him.

I’m not writing this to judge anyone or to tell people what to do with their lives. I’m writing this because I made decisions without thinking seriously about the consequences, and now I’m dealing with the consequences every single day.

If you’re thinking that sex is just something “cool” to experience and that nothing can happen if you use protection, please think carefully before making decisions that could affect the rest of your life.

Please learn from my mistake. Take care of yourselves, protect your health, and don’t ignore warnings just because you think “it won’t happen to me.”

I wish I had understood that earlier.