Been dealing with POCD for almost a year. I need help.

(26M) to give context I have been diagnosed with OCD and Anxiety disorder as a kid.

So about a year ago I was still dealing with a porn addiction lasting years. It started when I was a pre teen and was sexually assaulted by my mom’s best friend’s son for 2+ years. He introduced me to porn and I was hooked. In late 2025 I was watching porn when I had my first intrusive thought about my niece. It wasn’t even sexual but it was about her In my head while I was watching porn. It scared me so badly that I had a panic attack. And since then it’s turned into POCD. Every day is intrusive thoughts.

More things is that I was married in 2025. My Ex. Wife and I were already struggling but I had so much guilt I had to tell her. And she left me for it. Now I have a new girlfriend. We’ve been dating for about 3 months and our sex life was amazing. But during the July 4th weekend I had a terrible anxiety attack over a very bad intrusive thought in the night. It’s messed with my sex life now. I feel like I should tell my GF what my intrusive thoughts are about. I feel terrible not telling her. But I don’t want to lose her. The most I’ve told her is my intrusive thoughts deal with the themes of what happened to me as a kid and they are very scary and very real.

I’ve gotten back into therapy but he won’t do ERP. Only EMDR. I haven’t started the EMDR yet. Only the beginning getting to you know sessions.