Where is the line between: “My partner’s behavior is hurting me. She should work on that.” AND: “She isn’t responsible for my emotions."

Hi everyone,

I'm just really confused rn.

It could be that I'm mixing up completely different things here.

Does this question make sense?

It just popped up in my head and I can't see what I'm getting wrong. Am I missing something?

Sorry for the mess.

Thanks in advance.