This game is so depressing

So I started playing back in July of this and I am currently rated exactly 1003 in Rapid and 744 in Blitz, I do a lot of puzzles and try to watch a lot of educational content on YT but I feel like I have not improved whatsoever. I hang my pieces left and right and lose focus everytime my opponent takes more than 30 seconds to play a move. The worst part is that I can identify a blunder just AFTER I make a move (not before it) and it shakes my confidence so much that I resign on the spot

I really want to improve at chess but I feel so hopeless like its been 2 months and I am making the same mistakes I made at the start