Forgive and let go? Or not?

deal breaker or not?

I've (F24) been with my bf (M25) for 3 years. He's loyal and sweet and has proposed. I am his first ever girlfriend.

I know he had situationships and has done some stuff in the past. And i dont care about this stuff. because I had done stuff too and never shared it with him. even when he asked me over the years, id say no. I've never done anything with anyone. because I just dont believe it's anyone's business, and the past is the past. I know he'd accept me whatever my past is because he told me he would but still.

However, throughout the 3 years, he'd make it a point to say to me that he only had one kiss with one girl one time only and it was a mistake and hes never done it again cuz he was disgusted with himself for it. and he'd make it a point to tell all his guy friends that he tells me everything about his past so that there are no surprises, and advises his guy friends to do the same with any girls they're interested in.

However, I recently found out from him that he did more than just have that one kiss with that one person.

We were talking, and he said that he used to fool around with that girl. So I said fool around? Wasn't it only one kiss? (It was before we got together, and I didnt know him back then).

I saw that he got nervous and thrown aback. He then said "no wait im sure i told you that it happened more than once". I could see he was nervous abd he said i remember telling you, or i dont know im sorry maybe i didnt say because i didn't want to lose you i was afraid. I told him hey its okay i dont care about your past i forgive you but you didnt tell me, you hid it from me and lied (cuz hed always make it a point to say it only happened once) he said "im sorry i thought I told you I even always brag to my bestfriend about the fact that im honest with you abt my past and i always advise him to do the same with any girl he dates"

I asked him is there anything else you want to tell me? he said no nothing else happened. I said ok. he is otherwise honest as far as I know, too honest even. and I dont care about his past, I mean its hypocritical of me since I lied to him too, but I didnt make it a point say something that isn't true yk? Or am I being hypocritical?

Tl;dr found out smth abt my bf, dont know if its a deal breaker or not

Posted Sep 5, 2026, 4:00 PM UTC

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