My teenage years have sucked and I don't know how to make things better

I'm only 15 and from Scotland and I've never had friends to hang out with. Ever. I've been out with 2 people but they've been manipulating and using me for years. One left me last week because he thought me having a funny photo of him was worth more than our 9 year friendship and I've never had a girlfriend , I'm extremely socially awkward , I'm insecure about everything and I've never done anything teenagers do like smoke or go out late. Never been to a party, never had my own party it's super embarrassing to admit but on my 14th birthday my mum walked in the room and had to play a video of people signing happy birthday because I've had nobody. I've tried therapy 3 times apparently im too broken. My mum has been getting increasingly more emotionally abusive , I don't have a dad. I just got privileges to go outside this year and have realized I hardly know my own area. People in school make fun of me alot and I just wanna end my life. This isn't even half of what I'm going through but nobody will read the full thing