I’m so desperate to suck my first cock…

I’ve been thinking it about it for months, I keep arranging meet ups and then chickening out because I’m supposed to be straight but I’m just so obsessed.

My main thing is that I’m not into guys, at all, so obviously sucking a guy off isn’t what I’m wanting… but I need a cock in my mouth so bad that I’ve been looking at trans escorts… because then it’s a woman I’m sucking off right?

I don’t know what to do? Like maybe a glory hole would be okay because then it’s just a cock and I don’t need to know who’s on the other side, but I don’t know how to find one and anyone I’ve talked to doesn’t know either??

I’m so desperate and slutty…