[23 M] and [24 F], how to approach and communicate this in India

Hey everyone, I'm 23M in a livein relation with 24F and I wanted advice on how to specifocally ask her that I like being little extra dominated whenever we have s*x between us means I am into hard spankings where I wanna get more red whenever we are physically involved or whenever I am bratty enough, so the scene is I like femdom domination and not that exteme domination but I like the idea of being spanked not only with hand but also with another tools involved, like when I am bratty she could take me over her lap and can have me in place and fyi I am around 6'1 in height and she's around 5'5 so there's a gradual height difference, and it's not that she doesn't like it but she likes it a little less severe than me like whenever I am on top of her she keeps giving me slaps around me butt but not that hard but I have counted each and every time she gives me that and that rounds up almost 8-10 where 3 or 4 are genuine hard but I like some more of it so how should I approach this with her I have given her tremendous amounts of hints of using different ornaments or me being over her lap or me liking it this but her thought process comes at I don't want to hurt you through an extent like she thinks that thing hurts me a lot and I have cleared it out through words like it doesn't but like I mean we both are switch so I keep fantasizing her dominating me in the sense I want to get spanked and more of that things, so if anyone have some advice for me how to approach this situation help me out in a way ki how should I converse this with her, I get a lot of embarressment and awkward that I like this kinda thing and it is difficult for me to explicitly explain how or what my mind have in it so couples with some good advice please suggest as this is my first relationship and for her it's 4th so there's a gradual difference in that too. Looking out for genuine help as it have been almost 1 year that we are together.