Weird that i do not have any close colleagues

I have been in my current job for almost 3 years and its very puzzling that i do not have any close colleagues that i can rant/talk like a friend. This makes me think that i am actually the problem. Is it because my voice is loud or sometimes the way i talk is too straight forward, or even i am unable to pretend to be smiley all the time when people talk about something which i find it rude etc. I do have colleagues who are always smiling at people even though they might not like them.. is it because i am too real (show my real self) thats why my colleagues find me hard to be close to?

My office has quite a cliquey environment and because i dont belong to any clique, sometimes when we head out for lunch (farewell colleagues) i feel left out. It might be unintentional, but i do feel abit hurt emotionally because of how they might wanna just sit with their cliques and don bother about people who are not part of their cliques.

Everyone always say this is just a workplace you come and earn the money and don care too much about other people, you are the most important, learn to love yourself , other people's opinion are not important. But talk is cheap/easy, its so hard to put the words into actions even if i try not to put too much personal emotions at work. Also is it because i don have a close bond with my family which is why i try to find validation at work? Idk at this point i am just so mentally tired of all this people relations/emotions thing..