My mother is ruining my wedding planning and I haven't even properly started yet

Hi everyone,

I just need to rant a bit. I have talked to my closest friends about it but I need some outside advice/ opinions.

Context: I moved to another city within my country 5 years ago, met my now fiancé (whom they adore) and bought a house there. We got engaged november last year and have started planning the wedding ceremony for next spring.

Since day 1, we only wanted two things for our wedding: to do it where we live, sorrounded by nature and to have an extremely small ceremony with our parents, siblings and that's it. We both have huge families, and weddings are expensive. We don't like big weddings nor want to spend (or my parents) a huge amount of money on this.

I mentioned this to my very controlling mother before. She was reluctant at first, but seemed to come to terms with it. But yesterday she exploded and sent my dad to tell me MY wedding is HER day (literally) and that by having a small celebration I am cutting ties with my family, basically, and betraying them.

My mother and her best friend want to choose the location, guests, menu etc for MY wedding so that I can choose between their options (lol thanks i guess) and will not accept anything that is not with my extended family and in my hometown, despite knowing my fiancé's family is struggling a lot monetarily and can't afford to travel anywhere.

I truly don't know how to deal with this. I feel like cancelling the entire thing and just eloping with my fiancé. I even feel like I'm being selfish? It's ruining the entire thing already and nothing but what she wants will suffice. Any advice?