Newbie question

I have been attending in person meetings for 8 weeks.

I have an opportunity for sponsorship. They have sponsored many others. They offered to be mine, especially with regard to Step 4. Can someone provide some insight into what exactly I should expect from having a sponsor. Especially with regard to step 4. I want to better myself but I want to make sure I am ready.

I would like to take them up and I know they'd say yes. However, one big issue - I do not believe in a higher power. I want to. I am trying to. I was born catholic and the church scandal really messed my ability to believe up. I see this as an opportunity to begin down that path again. Should I get this in order first? I know the steps rely on the higher power helping but I am afraid of failing in that part (and having all the things I need to work on, but can't - if that makes any sense>

Can anyone help offer me advice for finding a way back to believing in a higher power? Any insight into what step 4? Your help would be greatly appreciated. My skepticism is relentless and strong. I had Christopher Hitchens on repeat in my my playlist, which I need to stop. When people tell me about their instances or higher power, my brain gets so skeptical and I shut down and say thats impossible.

Thank you in advance. I realize I am asking a lot and probably not being clear.