Platform/study recommendations for a perfectionist?

Hi all. I failed several times from 2017-2020. Never remotely struggled with a standardized test until failing the bar. It appears to boil down to my perfectionism. I never actually finish the material. On any of my attempts. Despite having plenty of time. Still never reached certain essay topics, and even the ones I have I do worse than the MC questions. Themis then Barbri. They throw these hundred page outlines at you and tell you to just skim them and the lectures then practice questions, and it appears that I literally can't. It is not what my brain is good at. I know that sounds defeatist or lazy or something, and I told myself that, said "just make yourself skim, there's no other way," and... here we are...

I am starting to think perhaps I should work within my shortcomings if possible, rather than wish them away. I think I'd do better with a platform that did more of the cropping for me if there is one. Or a tutor that actually walks me through the material upfront instead of reviewing my work? Is that a thing? Not much seeing that. Or maybe if I can't skim well I should give up, that's a fair take too.

Doesn't help that I find all the material really interesting. Also I went to a great school, but it didn't really teach toward the bar or memorization. More of a "you're all smart you'll figure that part out yourselves" situation. I am the first lawyer in my family and also didn't really get what parts of my education would reappear on the bar or the fact that it would be different than the other tests until it was in front of me. Add in the fact that Barbri/Themis don't let you study early and only open the platforms in seasons, if I'm remembering correctly, so I can't just take the year and go at my own pace, and... again, here we are.

My question: any particular platform or approach that we think would address some of these problems? Particularly the study early bit? I hear a lot of shout outs to Uworld, how well would we say that fits my situation?

I'm doing reasonably well in my career, which is part of why this roadblock is so frustrating.^(1) I am good at this. I've removed a decade from people's sentences with some tricky legal work that I'm very proud of, always had good feedback... yet here I am spinning my wheels while the world burns. I think it's time to try again. My current job is pretty accommodating schedulewise, and I can't count on that to be the case forever.

^(1) FUCK this test.