I (30F) resent my husband (30M), is there a way past it?

As the title says, I (30F) resent my husband (30M) and being bitter has been the norm for quite some time.

When we started dating, we both had a paying job. Our jobs weren't paying great but I earned a bit more than he did, I think. "We" bought a car, as in I pay the loan alone but he chose the car. I earned more, I paid more. Made sense at the time.

Then we decided to start a family and I stopped working after giving birth. The thing is, our financial dynamic changed but who pays didn't. He earned more than I did, because I stayed home with the baby but still I continued paying everything.

Postpartum hit me like a truck, managing "everything" (as in knowing what to buy from the store, what bills to pay, appointments etc.) and life in general finally took its toll and I just stopped doing.. anything. I become really tired (couldn't get out of bed tired) and we found out I was actually sick and got medication for it. I'm now better, but when I was sick I still took care of everything and everyone.

Our current situation is that he studies and I'm still on leave from work, working part time and studying at the same time. I'm trying to find more paying job so I could again provide for us but you know the market, not great.

I really do love him, but I feel like I have been his mother for such a long time that our relationship has changed to.. Well, to something thats not ideal for husband and wife.

The reason I see myself as his mother is that I had to tell him everything. We agreed alternate who cooks for a week but every time it was his turn, I had to remind him that he needs to actually make the dinner and not wait untill I ask when the dinner is. He forgot his appointments, so I reminded him of them. I even used to remind him to go to bathroom before we head the road, because 10 minutes in we always had to stop because he had to go. His behavior was later explained, when he was diagnosed with ADHD, but the damage was already done in my head.

We talk alot, we share our thought and we never had trouble talking about hard stuff, that never was the problem. The issue, to me atleast, is that nothing ever happens when we have our conversation. He says the same words: "I'll do better", "I try to be more proactive". I would love for once in my life, that I feel like someone would take care of me. So I wouldn't have to worry about anything.

But now.. I'm starting to wonder what if it's me, am I the problem (and I know I am to blame on some parts) and is there a way past this bitterness and resentment?

Any tips would be greatly appreciated.