Would I be wrong for giving my sister her dog back even though my parents are against it?

[Advice Request]

I’m 23F and currently live with my parents, but I’m actively trying to move out because my home environment has become extremely unhealthy for me.
My older sister has a dog that has been living with my family for years. Technically she is my sister’s dog, but because she hasn’t lived with us, my parents and I have been taking care of her. Over time, a lot of the responsibility has fallen on me. If something happens with the dog, I’m expected to schedule the vet appointment, take her to the vet, deal with grooming, take her outside, etc. My dad will also sometimes feed her things I specifically tell him not to, and when she gets sick afterward, I’m still expected to deal with it.
There have also been mornings where my dad has repeatedly opened my bedroom door because he wants me to take the dogs outside, even when I’m asleep. If I don’t wake up or the dog doesn’t poop when he wants her to, I get yelled/cussed at. The dog itself isn’t the problem. I’m just exhausted from being made responsible for situations I don’t control.
My sister wants her dog back. My parents have previously said she should take the dog back too, but this has become complicated because my relationship with my sister is extremely strained and there is a lot of conflict between her and my parents.
My home life in general is a huge reason I’m trying to leave. My dad has been physically abusive toward my mom in the past and has threatened me before. My mom and I also have a difficult relationship, and I constantly feel caught in the middle of my parents’ problems and my sister’s problems.
At this point, I want to return the dog to my sister because she is her dog, my sister wants her back, and I don’t want this responsibility following me while I’m trying to move out and become independent. But I feel guilty because I’ve helped care for her for years, and I’m worried that returning her will cause another huge blowup with my parents.

Would you give the dog back and remove yourself from the situation, or would you handle this differently? I really need perspectives from people who aren’t part of my family.

Posted Sep 10, 2026, 7:13 PM UTC

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