Rural Republican Blames US Postal Service For Failure To Deliver Any Of The Promised Trump Stimulus Checks.

Rural Republican Hugh Dumbass had this to say: "I'm still waiting on the Postal Service to deliver my Doge Check, my ACA rebate, and my Tariff rebate. It should happen soon though. Sometime it's takes two years for these things to process as the government is pretty slow."

When Onionheadlines asked him if he recieved the Biden era stimulus checks he said "Of course. Why do you think we're $40 Trillion in debt."