Is there something wrong with me?

I can’t make friends I did once but it was my siblings friends, I never had friends ever since high school and middle school, is there something wrong with me? And I just not nice looking? That’s why they don’t wanna speak to me? I talk to people but then they call me weird just a random hey hi, is there something that’s happening that I don’t understand? i read books to understand how to speak to people maybe that’s what’s wrong? Am I to loud? Am I to weird? Am I pushy?. I’m just tired of being alone I mean I guess have friends but there my siblings friends I can’t speak to them and yap about something… I see them as friends, but why can’t I make my own like someone I know that is a friend and will pick me- that sounds clingy but I don’t understand what friendship is supposed to feel like- ( I know you can speak to there friends since they think of me as a friend ( I think ) but there older then me and only will feel pity and I feel like I’m just pushy? Or I been alone for to long that I don’t even understand the feeling of having someone you can speak to. I have conversations but I think they run off because I try to hard- or I don’t try enough? Am I just being stupid… am I just lonely? Because I don’t act like I was before after losing my only actual friend. And with my siblings friends feel like i’m trying to make them laugh to hard am I that really needy for attention? like I’m trying to fit in but I mess up and just embarrass myself.