Don't have dysphoria or dysmorphia, but really want to be a girl?

Just trying to piece things together for myself. Been imagining myself as a girl for 4 years now, if I'm intoxicated I'm begging to be one. I'm 25. I've never thought of this prior to turning 21. I don't feel like I'm a girl that's trapped in a boy's body, or that I should have been born a girl. I just don't want to be me? So I'm trying to figure out if I'm just trying to run away from myself and being a girl will allow me to do so? Like, I just need a lot of therapy & medications and to get away from my toxic household and once that happens I'll feel more happy with who I am? Does this make sense? It just doesn't feel right to me to desperately wish to be a girl when I've never experienced what you have. Makes me feel like there is something else obviously wrong and I'm just using being a girl as a get out of jail free card or something. Idk. Thanks.