Village/Community

I started doing a beginner Pilates class after about 6 months after I retired in summer of 21 at age 62.
Weds mornings at our local Senior center. 15:students maximum, only 1-3 guys. It was a very friendly group of folks. Some of them were also volunteers where I do volunteer work as well. In the summer of 2023 I told them I would not be attending for the foreseeable future as my wife,11 yrs younger, still working, had been diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer and her chemo sessions would be on Weds. Some of the ladies immediately came to me and told me how they had survived their cancer. Some were 20 yr survivors. They wanted me to have hope, that it’s isn’t a death sentence. People get cured and get to keep living! Two women in particular stayed in touch with me over the next 18 months. I kept them updated on how my wife was doing with the chemo, surgery, radiation. That she had returned to work in late spring of 24. That I might be able to return to the classes soon.

Well that didn’t happen and she died in Dec of 24.

I started to resume ‘life’ about a month after she died. My volunteer work was one of the first activities, the Pilates class was probably the second. Now we had a new senior center and the class was about 25 people. Many had never seen me before when I returned.
I have been very regular in my attendance since. About a month ago I decided to do the intermediate class which is just prior to the beginning class. I went 3 times. I was still able to see my friends from the beginning class as we left and they came in.

But….I just haven’t had ‘the heart’ to get my ass to the class the last two weeks at all.

Yesterday I got a text from one of my ‘Pilates Buddies’. She, other people in the class and the instructor we were worried about me and my well-being. They wanted to know if I was OK. If there was anything they could do to help.

It honestly moved me to tears. Understand I live in a smaller community. I run into some of my classmates at the grocery store, cultural events, etc. We have lost two members since I returned in 25. One woman died, another we lost to dementia. She isn’t capable of attending any more. One of our class member checks on her frequently.

I responded to yesterday’s text with the message I would be returning to the beginner’s class next week, and not to worry.

Not because I can’t do the intermediate class. But because I need to be with those who care for me, and with those I care for as well. Sometimes these classes aren’t about fitness or being healthy.

It’s about love.

The members of the community Samba Band my wife and I participated with also checked in with us during our ‘cancer journey as well. Texts, visits, ph. calls. I will be doing a 3 day music festival with that group this weekend.

I am so fortunate to have community, a village that has supported us, and now just me.

I am blessed.