What can I do from here?

I'm probably a trans woman but I don't feel sure enough to medically transition and I don't want to socially transition without hormones.

I feel more nervous about taking HRT than excited, and it feels as though I want to take it mainly to avoid regretting not taking it in a few years to avoid the regret of not starting sooner that many describe.

I can't think of any reason why I would think I was trans for 4+ years other than it being true but I can't stop worrying

I worry that when starting hormones I'll feel the same as I do now, so keep taking them, then suddenly get irreversible changes, not like them then regret it.