Wife (33f) is going to pool with her friend tomorrow and then meeting up with someone she met online. She has no idea I (35m) know about the ladder.

Our relationship has hit a rough patch last couple months. The distance between us is obvious but we haven’t discussed divorce or anything we have just been less affectionate some arguments she has said some pretty awful things because I didn’t pick up the phone while at work. I got home from work and she was out with our two kids. I was getting my gym clothes when I saw her smart watch on my side of the bed and my curiously got the better of me and I peaked. I discovered a text with a number I didn’t know and the text is from the last 2 weeks. They talked flirting and they should meet at a neutral location at a restaurant or go for a walk, they talked about meeting a couple times in the two weeks but it hasn’t happened yet until today there is an exchange while she was out with our kids about meeting up tomorrow presumably after meeting her friend at the pool. My question is, should I confront her before it happens or should I wait? My mind and my ability to process this is not there. I’m just numb and trying to play it cool with her currently.