wow I love being me, my life is so amazing 🙄🤨

Night before? Oh it was PERFECT. Just me living my dream.

Her bed? Soaked. My bed? Apparently a 5-star hotel now. She INSISTS on sharing mine, like begging me. I’m like wow, me? Chosen? The masculine lesbian of the year award is finally mine?

We share a bed, she’s all over me, soft voice, playing with my bracelet, sleeping on my arm. I’m thinking oh wow she finally realized Zach with his crusty Lynx and 12-in-1 shampoo is not the prize, I AM. Silly me 🙄

Then lunch today? Even BETTER.

I’m in the queue, holding my tray like a good little wife waiting to sit with her. Zach walks up, whispers sweet nothings in her ear - probably something romantic like “my mom packed me extra chicken nuggets” - and she just MELTS. Full smile. Giggle. Academy award winning performance.

And then she just leaves? Like I don’t exist? Wow, love that. So empowering. So feminist. Love being the free mattress with feelings 🤨

Camila: “OMG MATH TEST!!!” YES Camila, math is exactly what I wanna think about while my heart is being ripped out in the cafeteria, thank you so much for that.

Mark with his sarcastic ass: “tough” _stares_. Thanks Mark, PhD in stating the obvious.

Couldn’t eat, obviously, cause who needs food when you’re being humiliated for free? So I went to the field and ran like I’m training to run away from all my problems. Which I am.

So I’m doing my dramatic main character run on the field right? After the whole Zach-whisper-lunch betrayal.

I’m sprinting like I’m in a sad music video, hair flying, tears almost coming out but I’m holding it.

Then my foot hits a hole. A HOLE. This field has the audacity to have HOLES.

I EAT SHIT. Full face plant. Palms scraped, knee scraped, and now I have a big ass bump on my forehead. People saw. Year 7s saw. They pointed and laughed.

So I limp back inside with grass on my shirt and a goose egg on my head, and matron is like “what happened to you??” and gives me an ice pack. So I’m sat in common room with an ice pack on my head like a cartoon character who got hit with a frying pan.

Camila: “OMG ARE YOU OKAY???” Mark: “...did you fall for her again? Literally?” SARCASTIC ASS.

And now my brain is spiraling cause what if she comes tonight again? What if she knocks and goes “hey my bed is still wet can I stay again?”

Do I say yes with a bump on my head and an ice pack looking like a Teletubby? Do I play hard to get? Do I be like “sorry hotel is closed, go ask Zach, I heard his bed has space for two and free chicken nuggets”?

Like I want her to come but also if she comes after doing me dirty at lunch I might actually cry while holding my ice pack 😭.

So yeah, 10/10 experience, would recommend. If anyone wants to borrow my bed, my hoodies, my heart and then go sit with Zach, my DMs are open 🙄