Getting big young ruined my early years

I was most of the way to my full size by the time I was a young teen. Since then I've only grown an inch in length and girth. That's one of those things that sounds fun, but growing up I was always an awkward kid and I didn't have friends until I made it to college.

This brought me to a point in my life where from a young age I put so much stock in to my size and it lead to me putting myself out there online when I was a young teen. This compounded on itself because I was being groomed in online chat rooms, loving the attention, so I put myself out there to be groomed more in online chat rooms because of my size on such a young person.

This has impacted me into my adult life too. I put too much stock into my size. I obsess over needing to be the biggest and it give me a dissociative feeling when I'm not, and I think that's largely because of the amount of attention I got from being groomed in those chatrooms.

Thanks for listening to my (probably mildly depressing) post, it feels good to get it out there.