Adoption ethics

The last few weeks/months have been a whirlwind. Back in July my husband and I started the home study process, I figured it would take months to complete and maybe years to be chosen and placed with. I struggled with infertility for many years but eventually came to accept and integrate my grief through much counseling and therapy. With my therapists support my husband and I started the home study process... not even a month later we were called with a possible placement.

The agency we were working with mostly handled home studies but also facilitated adoptions when an expectant mom reached out. They assured me that they dont market to expectant mom's and I only got their information by reaching out to my local child services agency. The home study agency every step of the way let me know the mother could change her mind at any time. They provided her with a social worker and counselor to talk through why she wanted to give up the baby for adoption. They also told me they dont typically choose to work with mothers who are looking for living expenses as they never want an expectant mom to feel coerced financially. Additionally they only showed a handful of prospective adoptive parents. Us being one of them.

The expectant mom chose us and we video called with her a few days later. During our conversation we assured her we only wanted to proceed if she was sure and only wanted to have as much contact as she wanted. We agreed to an open adoption where we provide pictures once a month, be honest with the adoptee about where they came from and allow the adoptee to meet their biological siblings one day. We were on board with all of this and still plan to follow thru with this.

The expectant mom was due to give birth in 3 weeks and she reached out weekly. Eventually calling us from the hospital right before she was going to be induced, we again asked her if she was sure she wanted us to come to the hospital, and she said yes. Once we got to the hospital she let us meet her son and even spend the night with him in a separate room, the next day she asked to be discharged and went thru with all of the consents so that we could adopt him. We're currently waiting for ICPC to complete so we can go home and i can hear him babbling in his bassinet now.

This is a dream come true for us but also I found myself having a moment of solace/sadness for his bio mom. I read so much about how unethical adoption can be. And while ive tried my best to make sure our adoption is as ethical as possible I understand why users in other subreddits feel like there is no such thing. Im going to raise my son knowing that while he grew in his bio mom's stomach he was also growing in my heart. That he is loved beyond measure regardless of what biological ties we may not have.

I guess im looking for advice on how to make sure we're addressing our son's trauma and how we can be the best adoptive parents to him so he doesnt regret us raising him one day.

TLDR: was our adoption ethical? Can open adoption ever be ethical in the US?