I(32M) have been with my GF (32F) since after high school. Will any medical intervention help?

Hey everyone, been a long time lurker here. I’m sure stories similar to mine have been asked and answered before but I just want some more clarity or input.

My (32M) and girlfriend (32F) have known each other since after high school, 14 years ago. We first hooked up the summer after high school but she went away for university. We messaged frequently but it was on and off due to the distance. She would come home to visit during the holidays and I went to visit her once. The sex was great but I think mostly due to the time apart. She has told me about previous partners during that time so I have no doubts that her libido was strong and well. She returned from school with a nice degree but one which would really lead to any important job in our city, with the exception of maybe a teaching assistant at our university. She suffered briefly with depression. I spent time with her through that period, and she explained to me that it was largely due to her peers moving on to accomplishing bigger things in life but she was moving back to a small(ish) town, where I also live, to live with her parents.

During the year off that she had, we started to hook up again. I pushed her towards a health care program at a major university in near our area (still a significant distance from where we were from), and she was accepted and moved away. We stayed together briefly while I helped her with the transition of starting a new program, moving to a new city, and making new friends.

We fell apart again while she was there. I started seeing others casually, and she did as well. We continued to talk to each other as friends while this went on. Some things with my job went poorly due to my own actions, and then I suggested moving in together where she was attending school(basement suite with two other roommates) and she accepted. I got a new job in the city where she was attending school and the sex was great, only for about a month or so.

Very soon it went downhill. Excuses such as I have a lot of studying to do, we have roommates who could hear, etc etc. After 3 months we decided to move out and rent our own 1 bedroom place. Same thing happened again, great sex for the first month and eventually died down. Reasons were school and studying. I eventually broke things up after 6 months and moved back to our home town.

Again during our time apart, I had casual FWB with girls and she saw others which leads me to believe there were no libido issues on her part. Covid happens, and she finishes her program and ends up back in our hometown. We start talking again and naturally end up back together and not seeing anyone else given the pandemic circumstances. Sex was great again during this time as we living separately.

She ends up getting a job in our hometown and we move in together. I feel like a fool explaining this again, but the same thing happens again. Sex is great for the first month and then dies down again. Now there was longer the excuse of studying for school or having to share a space with roommates.

If you have made it this far, this is the current predicament I am in. It has been 4 years together since we have moved in together and she has not initiated since the first couple months when we moved in together. We have argued about the issue multiple times, yet it never leads to any improvement. We went to an initial consultation appointment for couples therapy but she thought that it costed too much money, they’re out to take your money etc type of mindset (I paid for it). I tried suggesting her going off oral birth control, but she only lasted going off through one cycle saying that she didn’t like the unpredictability of her period. I have tried taking care of more of our household duties such as cooking meals, doing laundry, cleaning our apartment, etc but there is no change. I also take care and pay for all the maintenance/repairs for her vehicle but there seems to be no recognition of this at all.

My last push to try and remedy/diagnose this libido issue is for her to see a doctor, but we live in an area where it is very hard to see a family doctor. After many weeks of pushing for this, she finally got a virtual appointment with a doctor who suggested a blood panel test to check everything. She is now delaying it again saying the appointment for a blood test is weeks out, and complains more about how terrible it is to get health appointment rather than trying to book a time that works for her.

At our current age now, we are starting to look into purchasing a single family home. We both make slightly higher than average(also equal) income and can afford a beautiful detached home but I would be putting down roughly 66% of the down payment, and her 33%. I also would like to get married short after but after the lbiido issue is resolved.

Now I know the obvious answer would be to get the libido issue sorted out, then move forward with home purchase things and then move on with life etc etc.

My question is, have any LLF had success with seeing a health professional for libido issues? Have any HLM had issues with their partner like this resolved through medical intervention or needed change of their own actions? Are there things such as a blood test or other checks that could reveal reasons for a low libido? Or would this have been the point where you call it and find someone else more sexually compatible with you?

Thanks if you have made it this far.