What's the limit of couples counseling? When is it not worth it?

My situation is that we've been married for two decades. I've gotten to a point where I can no longer deny some fundamental truths about why our marriage has some chronic issues. The most important one is that he doesn't like me.

He is attracted to me, enjoys sex with me and cares about me because he's a good person, but the reason it's difficult for him to give me time, attention, connection and affection is because there's no drive to do so. When I bring it up, he will improve in minor ways for a day or two.

He is loyal, faithful, and caring in many areas. But when he enters a room he doesn't look for me. When he comes home, he is content to not make any contact. He leaves for the day without saying goodbye. He spends as much time as he can on his personal hobbies. It is typical for me to interact with him for less than 5 minutes a day (maybe 10 minutes if I've recently complained) and then he's locked in his hobby room. He's not upset in any of these examples, just indifferent.

Date nights consist of him rushing through the meal, while he talked about his hobbies and not ask me a single meaningful question. He might ask how I like the food or how my day went, but there's no real interest in connection. The date feels like checking a chore off the list.

I've repeatedly brought up this issue with increasing urgency and he doesn't seem to have the capacity to change much for more than a day or two.

For a long time, I tried to answer the question of 'why'? Was it an attachment style? Neurodivergency? Life stressors? I'm no longer interested in the why. Too much damage has occurred with too little effort on his part to address the issue.

I've recently discussed with him that I'm unhappy and the possibility of divorce. He broke down and asked for couples counseling. I'm not convinced that it can address something as fundamental as a spouse not really liking who they're married to, but I'm open to advice from others experience.