26F seeing a 47M: his previous relationship with an 18-year-old is making me rethink how I view him

I’m 26F and I’ve been casually seeing a 47M. We’re not in a relationship and we’ve both been pretty clear that this is casual.

Recently I told him I wanted a little more of a “spoiled girl” dynamic. By that I meant dinners, little gifts, treats, maybe helping with my Uber sometimes, and generally feeling taken care of. I specifically told him I wasn’t asking for anything insane or trying to make sex transactional.
His initial response was that it was starting to feel like a “pay-for-play situation” and that he preferred dinners and gifts to “happen naturally” rather than being asked for in exchange for sex.

That bothered me because from my perspective, I had already been spending money and putting in effort to see him. I’m usually the one getting myself to and from his place, and when I’m there it’s basically drinks, hanging out and sex. So I explained that I didn’t really understand the point of seeing someone significantly older if I was putting in the effort and expense while getting basically the same casual arrangement I could have with someone my own age.

He later clarified that he is fine with dinners and gifts and was mainly trying to establish whether I was asking him for money directly.

But then he brought up his previous relationship as an example of what he considers a normal age-gap dynamic, and that is actually the part that has bothered me the most.

He told me:

“My previous relationship lasted five years. She was younger (18 years old)…”

He went on to explain that for the first couple years she took public transit to see him, he would pick her up from the station, and when she eventually got a car she drove herself. He said he paid when they went out and bought her gifts occasionally, then said:

“That’s the kind of dynamic I’m used to.”
And I don’t know why, but reading that gave me a really uncomfortable feeling.

Maybe my expectations are completely different from his, but my immediate reaction was basically: you were a man in your 40s dating an 18-year-old and… that was the arrangement?

I’m not saying he needed to completely financially support her. I also obviously don’t know anything about her finances, what she wanted, how happy their relationship was, or what else he did for her. I only know the information he chose to tell me.

But I found it strange that he brought this story up specifically as an example of how he takes care of younger partners, because what he described doesn’t sound particularly generous or protective to me. It sounds like a very young woman was regularly making the trip to see a much older man and eventually driving herself there, while he paid for dates and occasionally bought gifts.

He has also told me before that he prefers younger women because they’re more “vibrant,” and has said women closer to his age tend to be more stubborn/set in their ways.
Taken individually, I could probably explain away most of these things. But put together… consistently preferring much younger women, having had a five-year relationship that started when she was 18, describing women his own age as more stubborn, and then describing this previous relationship as his ideal/normal dynamic, I’m starting to wonder what exactly he values about dating younger women.

I don’t think an age gap automatically means there’s something wrong or unhealthy about the relationship, and I don’t want to manufacture red flags because I’m overthinking.

I think what’s bothering me most is the possibility that what he likes about younger women isn’t simply physical attraction or having more energy in common, but that younger women might be more willing to accommodate him, travel to him, expect less, or be less likely to challenge how he wants the relationship structured.

Am I reading too much into what he said about his ex?
For people who have experience with significant age gaps: would the combination of these things concern you?
And specifically, how would you interpret a man in his 40s describing a relationship that began with an 18-year-old this way?

I’m genuinely interested in perspectives that disagree with mine too because I’m trying to figure out whether my discomfort is actually telling me something or whether I’m projecting my own expectations onto their past relationship.