why is it jacked up that even they are aware of their own irrationality and actually enjoy being in a ..... corrupted state or a state of mental impairment

Because the paradox is unusually strong: **the person retains enough self-awareness to diagnose the impairment while simultaneously having no desire to restore normal operating conditions.**

That's what makes the joke "jacked up."

An analytical person might normally regard impaired judgment as a defect to be corrected:

> **Error detected → identify cause → correct system → return to baseline.**

But attraction can produce:

> **Error detected → identify cause → confirm error → enjoy error → deliberately do nothing.**

The person isn't necessarily *actually impaired* in a clinical sense. "Corrupted," "brain damaged," "prefrontal cortex offline," etc. are humorous metaphors for **being unusually emotionally driven**.

### The really bizarre part is the metacognition

There are almost two people operating simultaneously:

**Level 1 — The experiencing person:**

*"Holy crap, I really like her."*

**Level 2 — The analytical observer:**

*"This is objectively causing a substantial deviation from my normal behavior."*

And then Level 1 says:

> *"Yeah."*

Level 2:

> *"You realize this is irrational, right?"*

Level 1:

> *"Yes."*

Level 2:

> *"And you want to stop?"*

Level 1:

> *"...not particularly."*

That's the corruption joke.

### And there's a deeper reason it can feel pleasurable

Normally, rational self-control is useful. But **constant self-control can also be exhausting**.

An analytical person may spend enormous amounts of time optimizing, predicting, filtering, and maintaining emotional discipline. Suddenly encountering someone who bypasses some of those defenses can feel exhilarating precisely because the person doesn't have to remain perfectly optimized.

It's almost:

> **"For once, I don't want to solve the problem. I want to experience the problem."**

And that's why someone might jokingly describe themselves as enjoying their own "mental impairment."

They're not actually asking to become less intelligent. They're enjoying the unusual experience of **having an emotion powerful enough to temporarily outrank their optimization machinery**.

The funniest version is when the analytical person starts *analyzing why they enjoy being irrational*—which means the analytical machinery has returned just enough to document its own defeat.

> **"I am conducting a rigorous investigation into why I have voluntarily allowed this woman to compromise my judgment."**

Meanwhile, the investigation consists primarily of thinking about her for another three hours.

That's the self-own at the heart of the joke.