I'm happy I had an epizode last night

I've been smoking weed every day for years, and I didn't stop when I started zoloft 2 months ago.

Well yesterday, after taking my antidepressant, I also took 2 helex (xanax) because my anxiety was through the roof all fucking day. As usual, didn't eat all day, since I have no appetite on Zoloft.

Last night I went to my friend's house to play some PlayStation and smoke some weed.

Well let me tell you, after that second joint i almost died. Shivers, throwing up, shaking uncontrollably, my legs my hands were trembling, I was cold and sweaty and totally out of it to the point where I passed out is couch.

So today, my anxiety is terrible, worse than yesterday, and that experience made me question all my life choices.

Which is good I guess, hopefully I will end this self destructive streak I'm on.