How do I cope with my trans identity?

I made a post a few months ago talking about trying to cope with being trans here

I feel like being trans has actively made my life worse. It seems mentally it has gotten worse at least how I personally feel. A few more personal life events that have stumped me for longer. I lost access to my car which effectively disables me from getting a job. I feel so low. And in addition to the therapist I have sucking and unable to change easily cause money and all the medications im now on basically making me only slightly better mood wise through out the day if I don't think about it. I feel like life has gotten significantly worse for me and my options have ran low. I don't wish to seek financial aid/disability since i still live with parents and i feel others deserve it more than me. But I also feel like a burden to them doing nothing every day for months and not even practicing my skills in illustration to become a professional. How do I cope with my self hatred of myself because of my trans identity? It feels like life since knowing i was trans has made everything worse and its so hard to think about continuing to push on.