My father with Alzheimer symptoms told me something that freaked me out about my deceased mother. UPDATE I have the answer

I actually talked to the lady who helps him around the house, cooks, clean and all that. She told me not to worry about DNA or anything like that. she knew what I am talking about and she told me that my mother did get pregnant again but terminated due to her depression and overall poor mental health. But my father fears she did it because she cheated on him. So it was not about me after all. He sometimes repeats that she was his and she belonged to him.

below is my original post

My parent's marriage was a horrible one. My dad (now 47) was extremely focused on his career, he was the executive director/manager of 2 big branches of a company, hundreds subordinates.. He travelled a lot. When my parents got married they were poor. I knew their story. Dad was obsesssed with my mother. He was tall and used to swim a lot so had a nice body and I was told many girls wanted him. But he wanted my mother. My mother came from a family which was way better off financially speaking. She was never interested in my father. I remember when she told me that she is "extremely" happy now but she was scared of how pushy he was in high school. She was 16 when she had me and he was 17. So they got married and her family cut her off.

I am a 30 years old woman, my mother died 4 years ago, she offed herself. she suffered from depression. He was a very angry and bitter man. He cheated on her a lot and had plenty options. status, money, authority and all that. And I remember my mother telling me she simply doesn't care. I asked her why she didn't divorce. She said she has no energy for that. I remember that he was living life. business trips, affairs with various women (Some affairs lasted months. but all he cared about was that my mother gets angry. she never did). My mother was in love with someone else her whole life. I know who that man is. And Dad knows too because at her funeral he didn't allow him to say goodbye. Dad treated my mother badly, like a caged bird somehow. he was very abusive verbally and emotionally. and physically too at least once, because I saw it. he asked her to block the number of a male coworker. when she refused he smashed her phone against the wall

Dad suffered a concussion last year and since then, even though he is all right mostly, he periodically has the same symptoms as someone with alzheimer. I found him crying one day. he was crying with his head on the desk. he looked confused and panicked and in a lot of pain and he said: the child was never mine. i asked who's child? and he said: her (and said my mother's name) was never mine. Next day he said he doesn't remember saying that at all. I am sure I am his daughter as I look like him. Light hair, blue eyes, tall. my mother was dark haired, brown eyes and overall when I was a teenager I looked very similar to how he looked when he was that age.