a lil fall semester vent

Okay, first of all, I feel like such a chud venting on Reddit, LOL. Alright, to begin, we must begin in first year: entered Mac, got into res(Woodstock has my heart; istg love that place), got rejected from health sci like most life sci students and began the torments of hell the life science program provides. Throughout first year, the only thing I cared about was getting good grades and being with my gf(more to come about this). So that's what I did: I sacrificed my first year to get good grades, whatever. So, a little context i guess, me and my gf are long distance, about 8hrs away from each other. We met through our families, and it was great, to be honest, but then it wasn't. I won't get into details, but we ended up breaking up midway through the winter semester of 2026; I'm pretty sure during reading week.

Anyways, when we broke up, it had me thinking: what did I do this year? What did I do aside from studying, eating, sleeping and repeating? I didn't do shit; I never went to any welcome week events, I never went to any parties, and I never made any friends besides the roommate I had in high school. After we broke up, it was sad, yeah, but we didn't completely cut each other off, which was probably a mistake, thinking about that now. So we got back together in the summer. Now that's enough of the girl talk for now ill get to my point, aside from my gf, I didn't have anyone, I didn't get into friend groups, and the one that I was introduced to through my roommate- I hated them. They were completely annoying; they just weren't the type of people I wanted to surround myself with. That also includes my roommate(that's a story for another time lol).

Anyways second year starts yayyy easier course load and just something i was looking forward too. So again me and gf went long distance and I got into residence again cause yk what FUCK COMMUNTING(sorry to all commuters i cant wake up at 7am). Anyways second year start a lot of things that I want to accomplish but ofc someshit has it our for me, first of all I CANT GET ORGO ALL SEATS ARE FULL AND I HAVE BEEN BANKING ON ME GETTING IT THIS SEMESTER SO I DONT HAVE TO TAKE IT IN THE SUMMER CAUSE I WANNA DO OTHER SHIT. Not only that bro I have no fucking friends as a second year i feel so depressed sitting in my room and reflecting on the day I had cause I know I didnt do shit Tbh i have been missrable, I hate being alone, I love being around people, I am sort of an introvert when it comes to going out of my way to talk to people but when Im around people I like and are friends with im the loudest one there and dont give two shits of what people think about me.

This past week has been completely shit I can't sleep until 6am and then my body is like automaticallt wired to wake up at any text message i recieve because of fucking seat alert so I wake up at 8 am from my mom texting me goodmorning and cant go back to sleep. Now fast forward to this shit whole of a weekend, again my gf brings up some bullshit andsaying she wants to break up and she doesnt have a reason so we ended up going on a break for a week to think things out now i truly have no one to talk to and if we break up welp shit im am screwed I know ill hate being alone and idk what the hell will happen and honestly im scared. I dont wanna break up with her but you know what its shit like this that makes me even more misrable. I decided to come home this weekend cause I have this pit feeling in my stomach that is not going away and i just dont know what to do. I want to have that "classical" uni experience, partying, having a close group of friends, etc etc. Idk, if anyone read this all you're so cool LMFAO!

Well thats me i still feel like a massive chud venting on reddit LOL