I feel like giving up

Hi everyone,

I need advice on how to deal with this. I sent this message to the ombuds of my university, but I don't have much faith it will change anything. I wonder if I would have some legal resource against my advisor, or if there's anything that could be done for her to suffer any kind of consequence for such shitty treatment. I am in the east cost of the US.

I joined my current lab in March 2025, and it was a strong pivot from the area I was working in and in which I am experienced. I basically changed to a field that is totally new to me.

Lately I feel like my advisor has been trying to undermine my work, and pressuring me to defend when neither of us feel my work is at that stage (she wants me defend latter in nov/2026). I had a fallout with her after my proposal (jan/2026), and ever since her treatment with me has dramatically changed. Before that she was supportive of my work and would give me guidance whenever I had issues. The fallout was because I didn't speak up against a professor (my committee chair) presenting, in a project meeting, all the analysis I did in my proposal as his idea, and suggesting his post-doc student should lead the paper on it. She was not in the meeting he did this, and all I could say is that I had to convene with her. She got angry at me for not speaking up, even though I explained I didn't feel comfortable confronting a senior professor in her absence. 

Since then, she does not advise me on how to improve my work, does not let me perform analyses I believe would be beneficial to it, alleging "lack of time" or that "she could give me 2 years and I still wouldn't be able to perform it". In April of this year, she threatened my PhD, and insinuated there was something deeply wrong with me. Ever since, she has been lacking in her advising, and I feel like she is setting me up for failure. She even went as far as passing the database I was working with to an assistant professor, and then declaring I was doing nothing useful. She also removed me from the project which the data I use for my work comes from, effectively delaying my access to data I need to proceed with my work, as now I have to ask and question third parties for necessary information for my analyses. She is dismissive of my results, stating that any high school student could do them, and yet, she does not help me improve my work.

She constantly tries to "psychoanalyze" me, insinuating I  had a troubled childhood, despite having no info whatsoever on my background. She accuses my parents of setting me up for failure. When I confronted her about how these assumptions were wrong, she then angrily stated "so I have no idea of what is wrong with you".

She consistently calls me incompetent and basically a waste of resources and time, no matter how hard I work, how much feedback I ask for or look for manners to try and improve my work. She disregards that the area is new to me, and whenever I ask for manners to improve my work, she is dismissive and does not provide straightforward suggestions or constructive feedback, always insinuating that I am incompetent for not knowing how to proceed. She usually makes these comments when no other colleagues are around, in person or through unrecorded meetings. I do have documentation demonstrating all the work I`ve performed, and witnesses of her treatment with me in some instances. I am not the first student to go through something like this with her, and yet I feel powerless to keep dealing with these abuses. 

I have been at her lab for less than 2 years, and at this point my mental health has deeply suffered, even requiring a medical license for me to recompose myself after a specially harsh meeting with her.

I am strongly considering giving up my PhD due to her unprofessional treatment and lack of advising.

I need counseling on how to proceed and what steps can be taken to remediate this situation.

Thanks in advance for any suggestions!