This is the text I sent and some of his responses. Context: pregnant, 25f, partner, 44m. We share email because I have to deal with all of his bills and court stuff for his son. Otherwise, he won’t do it. His family rescues him when he gets in too deep. Since we run a business together, his first baby mama’s attempts to collect  money and restrict my husband from seeing his son go very far without the my intervention or the attys and as a result, hurt me financially. It’s finally under control, 50/50. I fought like hell to get him there. 

Tons of photos of them together as well has her nudes from 8 years ago popped up in my Google Photos today. It’s hurtful and I’ve expressed I don’t want to see naked pictures of women he’s slept with. He told me he has 166 bodies. He’s very controlling of me and before I was pregnant, physically restrained me, held a gun to his head and laid under my car to prevent me from leaving. He was screaming at me outside on vacation to the point of the police being called. I convinced them to let him just go to a hotel for the night, then had to pick him up to drive home so his aunt and son wouldn’t realize something was up between us. 

He has women I’ve never met sharing their location with him. One is an influencer on IG. 

Mentally, I’ve been in shambles the whole relationship. Anytime he’s near me I do get anxiety because I don’t want to be sexual with him. He smokes so much, doesn’t drink water or brush his teeth. I tell him he smells (35w pregnant, it’s nauseating) and he lashes out. He has athletes foot as well. I buy him stuff to treat it and he won’t use it. I constantly had yeast infections.

No clue what to do. We’ve been through this so many times that I’m empty. My therapy animal was killed by the car when I was in a rush to get his son to a play date in the middle of my work day. He was underneath and I didn’t know. I was running to get back on schedule. It crushed me and still does. 

I felt nervous about the comparison and reporting when his son got back to his mother. I also bought a house with him and married him. It’s 2 hours away from my friends and I have no support system here. At least it helps with  proving stability to the courts for custody. Baby mama has left us alone without texts late at night. 

Do I try to fix this? Do I risk everything and leave? I tied up everything into making him successful. It worked but I don’t want the house. I probably won’t take my truck or motorcycle even though everything’s in my name. I’m stuck with a strong desire of flight. I’ll financially have nothing if I do this. I don’t even know if I will get custody of my son. I feel like I’ve been treated like young breeding stock as a ploy of revenge. 

AIO is this actually fixable