Feeling awful, can anyone relate?

I moved to a new city about a week ago, and for the first few days I thought I was settling in reasonably well. But now that it’s Freshers’ Week, I’ve started to realise how much I’m missing out on. Everyone seems to be meeting new people, going out and building friendships, while I feel completely isolated.
A big part of this is my living situation. I have a horrible, very controlling landlord, and she has already threatened to kick me out. Apparently, I was talking to her too much, which I honestly don’t understand. If she felt uncomfortable with how often I was speaking to her, she could have simply told me and I would have respected that. Instead, she immediately made me feel like I was at risk of losing my home. Since then, I don’t feel like I can be myself around her at all. Everything feels constrained, and I’m constantly conscious of what I say or do.

On top of that, I’m working from 8:00 until 4:30 every day, and by the time I get home, it feels like the entire day has gone. I genuinely don’t know when I’m supposed to make friends. I know people would probably say I should go to events or meet the people I live with, but realistically, I don’t feel like I have the time or energy right now.

I think what makes this especially difficult is that I’ve always had a really good friend group and a strong sense of social support throughout my life. I’ve never really had to deal with feeling this alone before. I gave a lot of that up by choosing to start working at such a young age, and although I know I made that decision for a reason, I’m now wondering whether I sacrificed too much.

The frustrating thing is that, objectively, I know I have an incredible opportunity. The firm is supportive, it has a strong brand, the university is part of the Russell Group, and the salary and pension are both good. The degree apprenticeship had an offer rate of just 0.4%, so I feel almost stupid for even considering whether I want to leave. I sacrificed getting higher A levels in order to take this route, and now I’m scared that I’ve sacrificed a lot of my life for something that isn’t making me happy.

I keep calling my family quite often because I need that connection, but it doesn’t really replace having people physically around me. I feel like other people would have made friends through their accommodation or university by now, whereas I’m working all day, going back to a difficult living situation and then being completely on my own.
I think that’s what hurts the most. It isn’t necessarily that I dislike the city or even the job. It’s that my life at the moment doesn’t feel like a life I actually want to be living. I feel isolated, restricted in my own home, and disconnected from the social life that seems to be happening around me.

I also haven’t really experienced this kind of sadness before without having my friends physically there to support me. I’m used to having people around me, and suddenly I don’t. I know it’s only been a week, and maybe I’m expecting myself to adjust too quickly, but right now I genuinely feel like I’m wasting my life. And I don’t know whether that feeling is something I should push through because this is an incredible opportunity, or whether it’s a sign that something about the way I’m living simply isn’t sustainable for me.

Posted Sep 14, 2026, 8:06 PM UTC

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