Don't know what to do but I feel like divorce is the only way to move forward

As in the title, I (23F) am hoping to get some insight and hear other people's story but if anything this is more so to vent. I am considering and leaning towards a divorce with my husband (22M).

My husband isn't a bad guy, our fights have never gotten ugly or out of hand. He has never caused me emotional or physical harm. He's just emotionally stunted.

We got married way to young and we will be coming up on our second year of marriage soon. When we got together initially, he was really ambitious, he really cared about the things that he did and that's what attracted me too him. I'm myself is really ambitious, I know what I want and I won't let things typically get in the way of my goals. And that's what I look for in partners.

He was like this all the way until we got married (big surprise). He got really depressed, and worst of all, he became unemployed. During this time, I was working two part-time jobs while going to college full-time and I had to add a third job just to make ends meet because he would get a job and find any reason why he didn't want to be there. On top of that, he wouldn't focus on full-time opportunities, he would only get part-time ones. I soon had to get a third job because of the rising cost of living where I live (which I shortly lost because I had to take care of him when he got institutionalized because his depression got so bad).

Before and after this, while he was home, he would help with cooking but any of the cleaning outside of the kitchen wouldn't get done.

I believe that I have been nothing but supportive and patient with him and I have wanted nothing but the best for him and for him to be able to live independently not live off of me because I had been there before when my depression got to the point where I was just bum in my late teens. I didn't get better and figured out whats the point of living until I sought the proper help and built the proper support systems currently in my life.

When I finally got him the fucking help, as soon as I stopped in for the lack of better words, micromanaging him and his symptoms. He started to go back to his old ways. And over the past two years, this cycle has continued. I stopped micromanaging him BUT, every time that I would just hint at a temporary separation, he would lock in, do what was needed and as soon as I just would let him exist, he would be back to old self.

While in some ways, he has gotten better (e.g. he's been constantly holding a part-time job for over a year, he seeing a psych, he sometimes cleans without me reminding him), he still has not what I need from him. Tell his family that we're are married.

My family knows and I have so many times, told him how much it would mean to me if his immediate family at least knew we were married so that I would stop having to pretend I'm just the girlfriend.

He also told me that I needed to find another source of income when I was already working two jobs and going to school full time that I need to find another source of income when I already pay the rent in full (no help from him).

And I don't know, his dad has already told me that he wouldn't blame me if I left my husband because of his lack of drive (came out of no where btw). If I'm not constantly on top of the finances, paying bills, driving us everywhere (because he doesn't have a license, even though he tells me that he is "working" on it), nothing will get done. If it something that doesn't involved food, he will not initiate it.

I can build systems that could potentially work for the both of us and back to as soon as I shift my priorities back to school and work a moment, the system falls apart because I am not micromanaging him.

What I need is to be able to for once fall apart and act like a fucking child for once and know that I can trust him to take care of things. Whenever I have a death in the family, or my family needs me to help them once in awhile. Instead of helping them out, or being with them, I still have to manage two households.

But. While my brain is telling me the logical thing of divorce his ass, my heart is telling me that he is still capable change and we're still young, he could get better. And I'm so conflicted. We haven't talked since that drive home but I feel like the conversation is only going to end me telling him I want a divorce. How can lifting the weight of my chest feel so good but make my heart hurt so much.

TLDR;

I got together with someone and he completely did a 180 after we got married. He's a couch potato and I have to micromanage my husband, and if I stop nothing will get done. I have to be the first to initiate anything and he will help. But if I don't expressively tell him to do something, he just won't. He sits on the coach all day when hes not at work and that is pretty much it. My grandmother (who is one of the only living relative that I am close with) who is my grandfather's caregiver was hospitalized and I realized how much that I was not allowed to be upset because things still had to be done.

And it's not like I don't tell my husband my needs and wants, and how burnt out I am. But this was the breaking point because on the trip back from my home town to where we live, I told him this and that I felt like the only one in this relationship, all he could tell me was: "I'm sorry."

It broke something in me and now whenever I think about divorce and going through with it before I graduate, I can feel all this weight being lifted off my chest.

But if you read this far, thank you so much for listening to me rant. If you were in a similar situation or could offer me some words of advice, it would be greatly appreciated. I hope you have a great day :)

Hope that made sense !