nervous about psych appointment tomorrow

i have a psych appointment tomorrow and i am nervous. it’s been three months since my last appointment with her, and she sent in three refills for my meds, only one of which i filled. i’m on generic vyvance and an adderall IR booster and the vyvance is just too expensive for how little benefit i get from it. they’re not really helping with ADHD anymore and at this point the only perceivable effect is dramatically raising my heart rate, which makes me frustrated and my already impaired motor skills get even worse. i have been taking leftover vyvance and adderall XR from titrating up, to avoid impacting my sleep.

i’m not sure whether to tell her all this. i do want to tell her the current meds aren’t working and are too expensive for me currently as insurance isn’t covering them. i don’t know what to do. i don’t feel comfortable with her, i lied to her that the meds helped when i was titrating up because i was frustrated and didn’t want to seem a drug seeker because they didn’t work. tbh i would much much rather have a non-stimulant because i am so exhausted and fried when i get home from work, and i need some benefit in the evening so i can actually do things besides be miserable and useless until i eat. i’d rather just be unmedicated than continue taking stimulants because i really do not enjoy how my body feels on them, or try ritalin (concerta’s crash was horrific.)

help :(